University

It's a privilege to be able to study, to get a degree and an education.

I'm afraid I'm not very excited about it. I like studying. No, make that I like learning things for the first time. I just have this unhappy feeling about going to university.

It's probably stupid.

There are several reasons for it, I guess.

1) I'm not sure that I'm going to enjoy the program I applied for. I think its the- no a -right thing to do. BEd will enable me to make an impact. Teaching is a people-related vocation. It will get me places, because many countries need teachers. Apparently the Primary Education Degree course is not challenging and may even be boring.

The subject I like the most (at school) is Biology. I don't want to do a BSc however, because I don't want to become a research scientist (and work with test tubes) or a High School teacher (and work with rebellious teenagers).

2) I was intending to do something exciting in my (now non-existent) gap-year. I wanted to go volunteer overseas, or even in this country, where there was need. Nothing exciting worked out (not even anything unexciting worked, come to think of it), now I default to university. I hate to default. It seems such a compromising cop-out. Better than hanging around at home, I guess. That would be bad.

It feels like I have waited for God to show me what to do, he hasn't, now I do what everyone else does. It feels wrong. Thankfully I don't just go on my emotions. I don't know what to go on at all though, besides my parents' approval and encouragement.

3) I feel quite plain and unpopular. I feel that everyone around me will have nice hair and fashion sense, and no-one will know my name. I'll fade into the background like an appendix (no-one knows what it's purpose is).

I wonder what is the matter with me? Why can't I be all cheerful and positive about this?

Maybe I'm just tired.

Speaking of which




I love this pic. I saw it on an airport. I'm afraid I don't have philosophical musings on it, but that would kind of spoil its effect.

 

Tuchniot l'Atid

"What, really? Oh okay. I guess its your life. So what subject are you going to teach?"

"No subject in particular. The littlies, you know."

"Primary School?!?  But... you're intelligent aren't you? Surely you can't waste your life like that. Really, you must reconsider."

"I don't get this. Are you saying that teachers are stupid?"

"No, no, that's not what I said. (Though I can't deny it really). Just: you're going to be bored to death."

"How so? Managing 30-odd children under the age of ten is easy? "

"Uhm, no... but it doesn't require much thought, you know. You just yell at the top of your voice or something. I don't know..."

Why do some people have this thing about Education? They think if you can do well academically, you ought to go study something impressive and tough.

They seem to think that education is for the lower class. The people who are 'not so smart' or desperately need bursaries.

How can educating the next generation be left to people who a) don't want the job, b) can't do the job.

Computers are less complex than people. The people above would be quite happy if I chose that path though. Despite the fact that I don't understand anything beyond the interface. (Yeah, I actually know that word). Despite the fact that I love children (which can not be said for those rectangular boxes with unidentifiable wires in them).

They say that I'll be bored studying education. What, like my brain is going to die? Like I'm going to sit there twiddling my thumbs?

I can guarantee that I will be challenged. It will not be a breeze. Don't tell me being uprooted and stuck in an university environment is not going to affect me slightly. I'm bound to notice. And by the time i get over it I'll be graduating.

So LAY OFF people. Stop telling my mother 'you must make her change her mind, really, you must. You can't let her do that.' Too bad you don't read my blog. ;)

So, I finally found something to blog about.

Another thing. In case you were wondering, the title is Hebrew.

The inarticulate sheep

Sheep are really dumb.

But I like them. Something about their glazed looks and woolly brains appeals to me. Maybe its their benevolence. They would never hurt a fly. Even in a whole gang they could never manage to. Its totally beyond their faculties.

Lambs are even more appealing. And they seem to be smarter. They look at you with somewhat more than boredom. Maybe they're just in the beginning stages of their growth into daytime hibernators, but they seem to still possess a spark of interest and curiosity. Could be hunger.

To get to the adjective. It appears sometimes that I am too inarticulate to blog. Using big words doesn't count. I don't blog with a purpose, with a message to convey. (Apart from analysing or criticising sheep and facebook). Hence my posts don't have conclusions.

Oh well. At least I enjoy myself. :D