The greatest portion of my life still lies ahead of me, should matters take the non-tragic course and I am not made a young martyr or come to a similar end before I reach a ripe age. I have an idea of what this portion of my life may look like, but that is merely a figment of my imagination, encouraged but what I would like it to be.
But we have no idea. I would like mine to be filled with children, joy and travelling. But at any moment the sea ahead of us (if time could be likened to an ocean stretching out before us) could present a tidal wave that changes our course entirely, or sinks our little ship and obliterates that future.
For a while before the possibilities of the future occupied my mind, I had been preoccupied with the idea that one shouldn't focus on the past or the future, but only on the present. And then a friend helped it occur to me that all along the 'present' we experience is actually the past, as everything we experience we experience after the fact. What we see, what we hear, we sense afterwards thanks to the speed of light and sound.
Which renders the present an uncertainty. The only certainty about it is the Lord, because he is there.
Which led me back to this:
don't focus on the present, you can't. Focus on the Lord.
